Labor of Love
I remember when Nikki once said that she only gave a blowjob to a man if she loved him. I thought, “Either she’s a bullshit artist slut not willing to admit it, or a total prude.” I mean, what’s the big deal with giving a blowjob? I like cock and there’s nothing wrong with giving a man pleasure, especially if he gives me pleasure too.
I don’t appreciate selfish lovers. Either they want to receive and refuse to give a little lip-smacking back, or similar to my first orgy experience where a cute Asian girl went up to Aleks and asked if she could kiss me. He had no problem with it, so he gave her the permission she needed. I felt a little strange, but figured why not. I wanted to see if she had it in her. It can actually be very difficult for me to come for a person I do not know, but she lapped at my pussy like a real expert and I got so wet I even forgot Aleks’ penis for a little while as I trembled under her face. I let myself relax and before I knew it she had found my sweet spot. It was so good I tried to stand up with my back arched and my head back about as far as it would go. I shivered quite a bit. It was really good. Then I gave her a few kisses and thanked her. She seemed so nice. But then I reached for her panties and she softly pushed my hand away and said, “No thank you, I’m more of a giver.” You’d think that would be nice. I was off the hook. Here was a great giver and I didn’t even have to work hard for it. But, no, I didn’t want to be off the hook. In fact, it left me quite uneasy. I felt used. While she made it sound like she had given me a gift, I felt like I had given her my orgasm and she wasn’t giving me anything in return. If a person touches me, I should be able to touch them back. Well, I let that go, but it kind of confirmed to me what had bothered me about Nikki’s policy. Whether I’m the giver or the receiver, I always want a sexual relationship to be mutual. I give when I please someone and when I allow someone to please me. So either way, if one is not accepting a mutual exchange, I feel a person is a selfish lover.
Well, I must be true to my principles. I think of the Asian girl and I think of Nikki. They are two kinds of selfish lovers. I don’t want to allow myself to be a selfish lover. Only problem is, I kind of am and I didn’t even realize it until Linda’s boyfriend came into the picture. I’ve been so happy with Aleks’ penis for the longest time, there is none that compares. They’re too wide, or too thin, or too flat, or too curvy, or too funny looking. I had so much cock in me the other night, yet I felt so unsatisfied, I came to realize maybe Nikki was right. I tried to be a good cock sucker, but I didn’t want to do what it took to do a good job with someone I wasn’t totally into. So is it that Aleks has such a beautiful penis? It’s the best I’ve ever seen and felt. I’m in heaven whenever I take him into my mouth. I mean, I make eye contact with him, I love to have him slap my face with it, I drool all over it, I spit on my hands and rub his shaft, I rub the little flesh on the very bottom on the head, and when I get really excited I squeeze ever so slightly. I even let him gag me or fuck my face. I really adore it. I could stare at its beauty for long periods, though I’m torn between looking at it and stuffing it in my mouth.
Linda’s boyfriend had a decent penis, yet it wasn’t the best I’ve ever had. So I found myself closing my eyes, trying to get it over with. I figured it was okay. I mean I don’t regret doing it. And the whole session was a lot of fun. The four of us so recently acquainted suddenly screaming, making squishy noises, filling the air with sex smells, and us all reaching orgasm over and over again (or at least me over and over again). What a moment. Yet, I really couldn’t enjoy any cock other than Aleks’. I wish I could do this with only Aleks and the girl and not have to suck any other cock unless I’m totally into the guy. Why put all that effort into anyone else? What’s the point? I don’t want to be a selfish lover. When I give I get. When I get I give. But after sucking so much cock and feeling unsatisfied, I find myself thinking, can I be just like Nikki, only willing to give a blowjob to the man I love? When it comes to girls, I want to give as good as I get and vice versa. And I like to be with a lot of girls. I thought that made me slut. But after sucking so much cock and not being able to give my all, I feel like such a prude. Or maybe Nikki was right. Maybe sucking cock is truly a labor of love.
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