Two nations divided by a common language
Anyone have an English-English dictionary I can borrow? Anyone? I am trying to do better at international relations than our hapless president Cuckoo Bananas.
When I told Girl I’d purchased a pair of pants she thought I was talking about underwear. Apparently “trousers” is the word I was looking for. Trousers.
She kept mentioning her flat, so I said, “Why don’t you take your car to the shop and get that taken care of?” My humble suggestion met with utter confusion.
I secured courtside seats at Madison Square Garden because she talks about knickers—or her lack thereof—quite a bit. Wrong again! As it turns out, she doesn’t even know who Allan Houston is. She was, in fact, talking about underwear, er, pants.
And when she said she likes a good shag I offered to take her shopping for one on Canal Street. She was incensed. “What kind of girl do you think I am?”
This is all quite baffling. I’m already knackered from trying to surmount the language barrier.
So now I pore over her blog and wonder whether it has anything at all to do with sex. Perhaps the Brits just use naughty-seeming words to express their love of horticulture, in which case I’m going to look silly showing up at the bar in assless chaps.
Do send advice, lest Girl return home with her knickers in a twist and the mistaken impression that we’re all a bunch of perverts who know nothing about gardening.
Last but not least, if you live in New York she could really use your help.
Comments Off | Top ↑
t17 | Sep 7, 05:44 PM | #
When I need to convert from British to American I usually use thisGirl | Sep 7, 06:40 PM | #
That dictionary is pretty good actually.Except when I say Knickers, I mean the cute hipster hot-pant variety, rather than big aunties bloomers.
Just thought I should clear that up.
Oh yes, and though I enjoy having a good tool in my hand, I have no interest in horticulture.
Lex | Sep 7, 07:19 PM | #
Not that you ever seem to wear any…Leslie | Sep 7, 08:26 PM | #
That reminds me that I had the cutest yellow knickers when I was 11..Lex, you know, it’s not just the English to English translation you need to worry about. The girl to guy language barrier comes into play too. In America, most straight men don’t even know the difference between a dress and a skirt. Oh, that’s just more girl talk now isn’t it?
We’ll all just have to work on our body language instead.
Bacchus | Sep 9, 01:11 AM | #
There’s a difference between a dress and a skirt?Dan | Sep 9, 07:12 AM | #
Bacchus: dress usually implies that the garment covers more than a lady’s stems, and doesn’t sit on her wait/hips/etc.ANewYorkJohn | Sep 9, 04:52 PM | #
I went to see an escort once, and told her I was bringing a bottle of champagne…. she thought I meant “coke”, and not the soda variety…. yes, I really did mean champagne, and it was Cliquot BTWjohnny | Sep 20, 12:23 PM | #
i’m a kiwi living in LA – the language barrier has always been a source of amusement for me and my friends. Mainly for my friends. live and learn ehh?!